Sunday, October 28, 2007
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
Some Women
Again, SOME, not all, SOME.
(Original piece written for a magazine column I was writing from 2001 to 2003. I've edited it a bit for this posting.)
Four girls and New York: a premise for a show that holds infinite possibilities. Sex and The City - not just about women, not just about the men in their lives, not just about sexually transmittable diseases but also most definitely about the desperation in all of us.
In search for the love that defines their lives, why do women fall for men who fall short of their ideal? Probable answer: They fear being alone. In a society that puts a premium on trophies (that Prada bag, the 3-carat diamond on your finger, that man - good-looking or otherwise - who could buy those for you), people find security in a partner. Some women want to be seen as prized, wanted, and taken. They believe that there is no logical explanation why beautiful, intelligent, successful women like themselves remain single and unattached. There is, you must admit, a certain thrill (or pride) and wanting in belonging to someone.
They unconsciously get into relationship traps because they all have Pollyanna views of relationships. They have to be perfect because their partners are perfect. That is why at the first sign of trouble, they panic and unleash the drama queen in them. At the beginning of a relationship, he is the best one a girl could ever have – he is sweet, attentive, handsome, intelligent, and sexy. Towards the end of the affair, he can just be described in one word – ASSHOLE!
They fear and hate being alone. Worse, they loathe the prospect of being with no one. There is a quiet desperation in all of them. They manifest this in many different ways – heightened vanity, posing to be helpless and behaviour that can best be described as coquettish.
If women were just to be themselves, confident about their entire person and what they have to offer, they’d have men eating off the palms of their hands. But because they can be insecure, they act in the most surprising of ways. And when they finally meet a man whom they think is the answer to their hunger, they eat him up with drama. That is why the Mr. Big’s will never be as big as they really are.
(Original piece written for a magazine column I was writing from 2001 to 2003. I've edited it a bit for this posting.)
Four girls and New York: a premise for a show that holds infinite possibilities. Sex and The City - not just about women, not just about the men in their lives, not just about sexually transmittable diseases but also most definitely about the desperation in all of us.
In search for the love that defines their lives, why do women fall for men who fall short of their ideal? Probable answer: They fear being alone. In a society that puts a premium on trophies (that Prada bag, the 3-carat diamond on your finger, that man - good-looking or otherwise - who could buy those for you), people find security in a partner. Some women want to be seen as prized, wanted, and taken. They believe that there is no logical explanation why beautiful, intelligent, successful women like themselves remain single and unattached. There is, you must admit, a certain thrill (or pride) and wanting in belonging to someone.
They unconsciously get into relationship traps because they all have Pollyanna views of relationships. They have to be perfect because their partners are perfect. That is why at the first sign of trouble, they panic and unleash the drama queen in them. At the beginning of a relationship, he is the best one a girl could ever have – he is sweet, attentive, handsome, intelligent, and sexy. Towards the end of the affair, he can just be described in one word – ASSHOLE!
They fear and hate being alone. Worse, they loathe the prospect of being with no one. There is a quiet desperation in all of them. They manifest this in many different ways – heightened vanity, posing to be helpless and behaviour that can best be described as coquettish.
If women were just to be themselves, confident about their entire person and what they have to offer, they’d have men eating off the palms of their hands. But because they can be insecure, they act in the most surprising of ways. And when they finally meet a man whom they think is the answer to their hunger, they eat him up with drama. That is why the Mr. Big’s will never be as big as they really are.
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Almost a Decade Ago
I've edited this piece just a tad...
Watched My Best Friend's Wedding last night.
Lessons learned:
•Tell the object of your affection what you feel very early on. If you don’t, you will regret it.
•Don’t ever commit to stupid agreements like getting married when you reach a certain age. Though agreements like the one in the movie might be spur of the moment, it'll affect you for a lifetime, that is of course, if it takes you that much time to find a mate.
•Let loose in a karaoke bar. You may sing out of tune but you can be cute. All in the spirit of fun.
•Never lick a dick in public. Even if it is an ice sculpture.
•Never tell your parnter about the love of your life.
He will never be able to live up to the other's traits. This'll create a lot of pent-up jealousy. Though true love is secure, not all relationships can claim true love.
•Walk away.
Only when all has been said and done - and the fruits of your maneuverings are not to your liking.
•Never ever call anyone your own.
No one is proprietarily yours until that person holds you in the same context.
•Though it is wonderful to reminisce about old times, don’t let these memories cloud your reality. Experiences about romance can be overwhelming. Keep in mind that they are merely experiences now. Learn from and cherish these. Live and lead a better life. No use dwelling in the past.
•Never beg anyone to marry you.
Pathetic.
Watched My Best Friend's Wedding last night.
Lessons learned:
•Tell the object of your affection what you feel very early on. If you don’t, you will regret it.
•Don’t ever commit to stupid agreements like getting married when you reach a certain age. Though agreements like the one in the movie might be spur of the moment, it'll affect you for a lifetime, that is of course, if it takes you that much time to find a mate.
•Let loose in a karaoke bar. You may sing out of tune but you can be cute. All in the spirit of fun.
•Never lick a dick in public. Even if it is an ice sculpture.
•Never tell your parnter about the love of your life.
He will never be able to live up to the other's traits. This'll create a lot of pent-up jealousy. Though true love is secure, not all relationships can claim true love.
•Walk away.
Only when all has been said and done - and the fruits of your maneuverings are not to your liking.
•Never ever call anyone your own.
No one is proprietarily yours until that person holds you in the same context.
•Though it is wonderful to reminisce about old times, don’t let these memories cloud your reality. Experiences about romance can be overwhelming. Keep in mind that they are merely experiences now. Learn from and cherish these. Live and lead a better life. No use dwelling in the past.
•Never beg anyone to marry you.
Pathetic.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
One Can't Claim to be a Victim
From Paulo Coelho's The Witch of Portobello:
No one can manipulate anyone else. In any relationship, both parties know what they're doing, even if one of them complains later on that they were used.
No one can manipulate anyone else. In any relationship, both parties know what they're doing, even if one of them complains later on that they were used.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Vas-te faire foutre!!
One fuckface had the temerity to post a comment on my I Am Filipino posting asking about the "substance of the phrase (ie proud to be Filipino) when 90% of our countrymen are living below the poverty line." The writer, whom to me is unknown, was also audacious enough to tell me what to do with my earnings. (I've chosen to reject that comment from my posting because I can.)
Excuse me, fuckface, as I vomit over your militant pronouncements.
I have done fairly well for myself. I wasn't born with a silver spoon and I know what it is like to have very little. With perserverance, skill, hard work, and milking every learning opportunity that was presented to me, I've moved on to better circumstances without stepping on anyone's toes or trampling on egos.
If I can, others can, too. And it shouldn't take militant agenda by other fuckfaces to further the cause of improving lives and eliminating poverty. Continue wallowing in poverty and you will get nothing done to improve your situation. Stop being sorry for yourselves and get up! Get rid of that ridiculously bloated sense of entitlement - believing that the world and others owe you. Don't pull others down when they are up. Don't be jealous, be inspired.
Perhaps fuckface hasn't lived abroad and hasn't had to deal with all the negativity ascribed to Filipinos. I live everyday abroad showing the other citizens of the world that a Filipino can be good, successful, ethical, decent, honest, honorable and trustworthy.
I am proud of Filipino talent. Every Christmas, I give friends of many, many different nationalities an original music CD of a Filipino artist. Last Christmas it was Lani Misalucha's CD. In previous years I'd given out Regine's, Freestyle's, Janno's, Nina's and MYMP's among many others. That's how I choose to spend my money at the same time promote Filipino talent so that others may learn to appreciate it.
The mere suggestion of fuckface on how to use my money pisses me off. How would you all feel if I told you what to do with your money? If you earn it, you have every right to do whatever with it that pleases you. And unless you, fuckface, become the hand that feeds me, you should just keep your inanity between your ears.
Excuse me, fuckface, as I vomit over your militant pronouncements.
I have done fairly well for myself. I wasn't born with a silver spoon and I know what it is like to have very little. With perserverance, skill, hard work, and milking every learning opportunity that was presented to me, I've moved on to better circumstances without stepping on anyone's toes or trampling on egos.
If I can, others can, too. And it shouldn't take militant agenda by other fuckfaces to further the cause of improving lives and eliminating poverty. Continue wallowing in poverty and you will get nothing done to improve your situation. Stop being sorry for yourselves and get up! Get rid of that ridiculously bloated sense of entitlement - believing that the world and others owe you. Don't pull others down when they are up. Don't be jealous, be inspired.
Perhaps fuckface hasn't lived abroad and hasn't had to deal with all the negativity ascribed to Filipinos. I live everyday abroad showing the other citizens of the world that a Filipino can be good, successful, ethical, decent, honest, honorable and trustworthy.
I am proud of Filipino talent. Every Christmas, I give friends of many, many different nationalities an original music CD of a Filipino artist. Last Christmas it was Lani Misalucha's CD. In previous years I'd given out Regine's, Freestyle's, Janno's, Nina's and MYMP's among many others. That's how I choose to spend my money at the same time promote Filipino talent so that others may learn to appreciate it.
The mere suggestion of fuckface on how to use my money pisses me off. How would you all feel if I told you what to do with your money? If you earn it, you have every right to do whatever with it that pleases you. And unless you, fuckface, become the hand that feeds me, you should just keep your inanity between your ears.
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